Hella Warriors Poetry V

Before I get into it, I wanna start by saying I finally released a Super Bowl joke today. 

That's right, it’s hella ridiculous. I was telling Robert and my dad Tom I’m about to get you good, watch, for like five hundred wds.

Hella topical and relevant, it’s a timely piece. I was gonna publish it w another journal, but they do like a pdf, and they dk when it’s coming out, so I had to hit another editor to see if he could get it up by Thursday. 

I was gonna say if he couldn’t I would’ve had to post it here, but he said he could have it up sooner than that, and by that he meant today, so here it is. 

Stop calling Tom Brady the goat on expat lit. 

Also shoutouts to manny for putting this one out there just in the nick of time, thanks again. 

Anyway, I keep thinking what if I interviewed marshawn Lynch about Stephen Curry on my blog? That would be sick, right? That would be tight af.

Curry's still running around, you know? I was gonna say he doesn't care anymore after seeing him score 57 points in their loss to the mavs, but then after seeing them lose to the spurs on Monday I was like nvm, he's pissed. Did you see him kick the air? And who can blame him?

I mean what was Draymond thinking, right? He must've been thinking like I'm gonna save the day. He must've thought someone would try to get him to the line, but no one contested it. No, no one was gonna. Why would they? It's not like it's Curry. It's not like who it was supposed to be.

Different story last night though, w Curry's 32 points, they must've won by something like 20-30. As the oldest living coach in the NBA at 72, Gregg Popavich was popapissed. 

You know Texas has hella basketball teams though; Spurs, Rockets and mavs. But Texas is also hella big. All those places are all like three to four hrs a part. Noticed the spurs must not be in as much high demand as the mavs too, bc their game against the warriors wasn't nationally televised. The mavs made tnt, and abc. Probably cause of that fool Luka. Everyone hella fucks w Luka. 

I was thinking the other day I don’t think doncic drinks, but he probably does shit w weed you couldn’t ever possibly even get your head around. All of them do, right? All athletes, Kansas City Chiefs Safety Tyrann Mathieu showed up to his first practice at LSU in a hotbox, and it wasn't chill. He did time for it. He was doing time when he was drafted.

Speaking of which, Quarterback Patrick Mahommes better get checked out after that game. CTE is so real, and it's even worse for boxers. How do you think Muhammad Ali got parkinsons? As he got older he'd just let opponents beat the shit out of him until they got tired.

I didn't know that. I had no idea until Ladson told me at the superbowl. He also told me shaggy was in the marines. That's right, Mr. Bombastic was in the gulf war. He wrote it wasn't me in a foxhole. 

Watching the nuggets last night, I was like what's the mile high club, and Robert was like it's when you have sex on an airplane, and I was like oh, bc it says mile high on the nuggets jerseys. He was like oh no, that's for the city, mile high city in Denver. That would be a crazy thing to have on your jersey, and I was like yeah, they'd be like I'm sorry but you guys can't name your city after that slogan.